Presbyterian, Methodist, Church of Christ

Greymouth Uniting Church


A doctor, a lawyer, a little boy and a priest were out for a Sunday afternoon flight on a small private plane. Suddenly the plane developed engine problems. In spite of the best efforts of the pilot the plane started to go down. Finally the pilot grabbed a parachute, yelled to the passengers that they had better jump and bailed out. Unfortunately there were only three parachutes remaining. The doctor grabbed one and said "I'm a doctor and save lives, so I must live." and jumped out. The lawyer said, "I'm the smartest man in the world, I deserve to live." He grabbed a parachute and jumped out. The priest looked at the small boy and said, "My son, I've lived a long and full life. You are young and have your whole life ahead of you. Take the last parachute and live in peace." The little boy handed the parachute back to the priest and said "Not to worry Father. The smartest man in the world just jumped with my backpack."

Laughter, it's said, is the best medicine. When we laugh our bodies react in positive ways:

  • pain is reduced
  • blood sugar levels are reduced
  • job performance is improved - we are more creative
  • facial muscles stretch
  • endorphins are released - like chocolate/pleasure
  • reduces the effects of stress
  • we sing better
  • good for cardiovascular health - expands blood flow

It can be likened to internal aerobics. A good belly laugh 100x/day = 10 minutes on a rowing machine.

Laughter beats stress it changes the perspective you go to a place of joy it connects you with others

A tram driver in Melbourne - happy / welcoming / singing

"You ask why I'm so happy. I never used to be. I hated the traffic and some of the passengers were a pain in the neck. Then one day I decided that if I didn't change, the stress would kill me. So I decided to have some fun... and I do. I make a joke of things, talk to the passengers and don't let bad drivers annoy me. People think I'm mad, but I've never been happier."

When we laugh, the 'feel good' vibes we give off are caught by others. Laughter is contagious. 10 minutes of hearty laughing gives you 45 minutes of decreased blood pressure and heart rate.

Did you know you can go to laughter yoga? A combination of yoga breathing exercises and laughing merrily just because it is good for you.

It has been found that on average children laugh about 400 times a day - adults only about 12 times. Our reactions, our words can create feelings and reactions. So why not aim for happy?

Christchurch taxi driver - welcoming / chatty

"Gee you're a happy person."
He smiled and said: "That's my job, to be happy. No one wants a miserable person driving them"
"But aren't there days when you wake up in the morning and you don't feel happy?"
"Of course, everyone has those days. But when that happens I just fake it until I feel it!"

We are the only people who can change how we look at things.

Much of our training in society is 'serious' training - professions; growing up; different to 'fun' training - doing your job well.

A good belly laugh is worth 10,000 groans and a million deep sighs.

Humour and laughter improve teaching, selling, healing or investing.

Happy people are: less stressed; lighter; loving; relaxed; love fun; attract friends; feel good; have good health.

The Dali Lama said: "The purpose of life is to find happiness."

This is something we choose. Count your blessings:

  • alive
  • born
  • where you live - what's good about NZ
  • personal assets - home; food; family; friends

Six of the best - Today what was the best thing:

  1. I saw
  2. I ate
  3. I received
  4. I did for me
  5. I did for someone else
  6. I found funny


God give us rain when we expect sun.
Give us music when we expect trouble.
Give us tears when we expect breakfast.
Give us dreams when we expect a storm.
Give us a stray dog when we expect congratulations.
Good play with us, turn us sideways and around.

By Michael Leunig

Visiting his grandparents, a small boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out. He picked it up and found that it was an old leaf that had been pressed flat between the pages. "Mama, look what I found," he called out.
"What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked."
With astonishment in his voice, the boy answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear!"
A teacher was testing the children in her Sunday school class to see if they understood the concept of getting to heaven.
She asked them, "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into Heaven?"
"NO!" the children answered.
"If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?"
Again, the answer was, "NO!"
Now she was smiling. Hey, they're getting it, she thought! "Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into Heaven?" she asked.
Again, they all answered, "NO!"
She was just bursting with pride for them. "Well," she continued, "then how can I get into Heaven?"
A five-year-old boy shouted out, "YOU GOTTA BE DEAD."
The loving husband
A man had two of the best tickets for the Rugby World Cup Final. As he sits down, another man comes along and asks if anyone is sitting in the seat next to him. "No ..... ," he says, "the seat is empty."
"This is incredible ........ !" said the man, "who in their right mind would have a seat like this for the Rugby Cup Final, the biggest sporting event of the Rugby World and not use it? 
He says, "Well actually, the seat belongs to me. My wife was supposed to come with me, but she passed away. This is the first Cup Final we haven't been to, together, since we got married ..... ....
"Oh . . .. I'm sorry to hear that. That's terrible. I guess you couldn't find someone else, a friend, or relative, or even a neighbour, to take the seat?"
The man shakes his head .. .. ., "No ..... . They're all at the funeral."
The Zen master asked the hot dog vendor, "Can you make me one with everything?" The hot dog vendor handed him his hot dog and the Zen master handed him $10. After a few minutes the Zen master asked, "What about the change?" The hot dog vendor replied, "My son, the change must come from within."
From Genesis: "And God promised men that good and obedient  wives would be found in all corners of the earth."
Then He made the earth round...and He laughed and laughed and laughed!....
A woman went to the doctor's office where she was seen by one of the new doctors, but after about 4 minutes in the examination room, she burst out, screaming as she ran down the hall.
An older doctor stopped her and asked what the problem was, and she told Him her story. After listening, he had her sit down and relax in another room.
The older doctor marched down the hallway to the back where the first doctor was and demanded, "What's the matter with you? Mrs. Terry is 63 years old, she has four grown children and seven grandchildren, and you told her she was pregnant?!"
The new doctor continued to write on his clipboard and without looking up said, "Does she still have the hiccups?
Fable of the Hedgehog
It was the coldest winter ever. Many animals died because of the cold.
The Hedgehogs, realizing the situation, decided to group together to keep warm. This way they covered and protected themselves; but the quills of each one wounded their closest companions.
After a while, they decided to distance themselves one from the other and they began to die, alone and frozen. So they had to make a choice: either accept the quills of their companions or disappear from the Earth.
Wisely, they decided to go back to being together. They learned to live with the little wounds caused by the close relationship with their companions in order to receive the heat that came from the others. This way they were able to survive.
The best relationship is not the one that brings together perfect people, but when each individual learns to live with the imperfections of others and can admire the other person's good qualities.
The moral of the story is: Just learn to live with the Pricks in your life!
At the pearly gates again, a taxi driver and minister are waiting in line. St. Peter consults his list and says to the taxi driver, "Take this silken robe and golden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven."
St. Peter next greets the minister saying, "Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom of Heaven."
"Just a minute," says the minister. "That man was a taxi driver, and he gets a silken robe and golden staff while I get a cotton robe and wooden staff. How can this be?"
"Up here, we work by results," says St. Peter. "While you preached, people slept; while he drove, people prayed."